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EXCLUSIVE: Monique Samuels Talks The Hard Work She Put In To Save Her Marriage

THE WOMAN KING Special Screening At The National Museum Of African American History And Culture

Monique Samuels.                            Source: Paul Morigi / Getty

On the last season of Love & Marriage: DC, viewers watched a Monique and Chris Samuels worked through a rough patch in their marriage. Monique Samuels was more than nervous about the longevity of their union after they hit the 10-year-mark. As Monique pressed for Chris improve his communication among other things, he struggled to meet her half-way.

When rumors of a separation spread, it seemed like their efforts were to no avail. The former Real Housewives of Potomac stars took to YouTube to explain that their marriage was far from over and that they were living separately so distance can make the bond grow stronger.

“Without further explanation, everyone knows that when you say the words separation, that insinuates a divorce. Are Chris and I getting a divorce? No!,” she said. “We aren’t getting a divorce. Are we going our separate ways? Absolutely not, nobody said that. Have we filed a legal separation? No. Have we filed for divorce? No. Is there any document that proves any divorce filings? No. Have we separated to the extent of breaking up? No.”

All Of Monique And Chris’ Efforts To Save Their Marriage Weren’t Aired

When MADAMENOIRE caught up with Samuels over the summer, she spoke about their rookie season on Love & Marriage and how a lot of the hard work they put into their marriage wasn’t shown. Besides looking to the other couples on the show for advice, their meetings with their marriage therapist and Chris’ life coach weren’t aired.

“So a lot of the context behind me and Chris’ arguments weren’t shown,” she told MN over the phone. “So we open up in the first episode, and y’all hear me talk about this list. You don’t see the marriage counseling sessions. You don’t see Chris talking with his life coach and you don’t see me having a conversation with his life coach. The life coach requested that she speak with me because she didn’t feel like she was making much ground with Chris. So you don’t see what led up to the heated conversations. And then you never find out  [what happened] as the season progresses.”

In one session with a life coach that didn’t make the cut, Monique shared that she felt she more disconnected from Chris than she ever had before.

“I got to a point where I felt like I did not know who my husband was,” she continued. “I felt like he was almost like a stranger. We barely talk about anything that that really needs to be addressed. I’m not a person that pushes things under a rug. He is. So I’m like we’re not going to move past this moment if we don’t address some of the issues that are going on and some of the things that I’ve been expressed to him. I just felt very unheard and like he was brushing me off.

Monique Said ‘Love & Marriage: DC” Didn’t Always Show What Led To Their Arguments

Monique made sure not to sugarcoat anything because the cameras were rolling and voiced her frustrations loud and clear. Sometimes it was so loud that viewers felt she trying to push Chris to file for divorce by embarrassing him, which she adamantly denied. She said that so much context was left out of the show that her frustration was mistaken as unnecessary aggression. The cameras didn’t show her repeated tries at getting what she needed from her husband. So at times, she snapped.

“It’s a build up to that,” she said. “And even at the beginning of those conversations, you’ll see that it starts out real sweet. But there’s only so many times you can deliver a message. At a point in time, it’s gonna get to where you get frustrated, and I’m a human. And I got frustrated, you know? So there was a lot of the context that was just missing as to why we were even arguing.”

While Monique and Chris had their ups and downs, other couples can still learn from them. From watching them on Love & Marriage, Monique said she hoped that other couples learned the importance of communication and vulnerability in a relationship.

“Throughout the season, that also wasn’t shown, is the lack of vulnerability in my husband,” she continued. “If you can’t be vulnerable with your spouse, what is the point? If you feel more comfortable talking to outside sources about things that are concerning your spouse, what is the point? It affects your intimacy, it affects your whole overall relationship and it affects the friendship. You can’t just brush things under a rug and then expect things to be hunky dory.”

Watch their full YouTube video below.

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