Why Everyone Is Talking About Relationship YouTuber Derrick Jaxn’s Cheating Apology Video

(Photo by Paras Griffin/Getty Images) By Essence ·March 23, 2021March 23, 2021

If you’ve been seeing the name Derrick Jaxn trending on your social media timeline for days, it’s because a recent revelation about the popular relationship-advice YouTuber and a subsequent apology video have gone viral. The story has been covered everywhere from Newsweek to The Shade Room and it has a lot of people talking about it on their feeds. In case you aren’t familiar with the author and Internet personality, or his work, here’s a breakdown of who he is, why he’s trending and why Black women are so up in arms about it right now.

The Background

Derrick Jaxn entered the public sphere for the first time back in 2012 on his blog, revealing the mistakes that caused him to lose his college sweetheart, Da’Nai. The couple eventually reconciled, got married and started a family together and Jaxn chronicled their story on social media. He became well-know for revealing the strategies he said strengthened their relationships with themselves and one another and for sharing relationship advice with the masses.

He penned several books on the topic including Things She Wishes You Understood and A Cheating Man’s Heart and created card games designed to promote stimulation and intimacy between partners. He infused Biblical references into some of his content but also did not consistently post images of the happy family he frequently referenced. Jaxn has cited privacy concerns as the reason he chose not to put his family in the public eye.

Jaxn attracted over a million devoted followers as he sat in the front seat of his car sharing his energetic soliloquies which often challenged couples and singles to rethink the way they approach their own romantic relationships, keeping integrity and honesty in mind.

The Revelation

Jaxn’s happy relationship status was challenged when murmurs of an alleged affair between him and a then unnamed woman began to circulate around gossip sites and comment threads in early March. This week, a woman named Candice De Medeiros alleged that she engaged in an affair with him. Audio of De Medeiros claiming to have gone on a luxe weekend baecation with Jaxn to Miami appeared on the popular Youtube channel of vlogger Tasha K. She alleged Jaxn told her he was separated from his wife, Da’Nai Jackson, and invited her to his home where she said she saw moving boxes that appeared to support his claim. De Medeiros also produced a selfie she said was taken in his bed and several other piece of proof she alleges are from their private correspondence.

Jaxn initially claimed that he was separated in response to the rumors, posting a now deleted video in which he implied that he had not cheated on his wife. Then the “Self Love Ambassador” issued a video confession with his wife sitting by his side. Jaxn admitted that he was married when the alleged affair took place and implied that De Medeiros was not the only person he may have been involved with when he stepped out on his marriage. “Derrick Jaxn was involved with other women outside the marriage and by involved I want to be clear, I’m not talking about just casually kicking it maybe a lunch or something like that, I’m talking about as serious as sex to sexual flirtation and meeting up and that kind of thing,” he said while talking to the camera.

Later in the video, Jaxn discussed needing spiritual support to make better choices. “You have to have the grace of God to break free from certain things, to stay away from certain things, to not operate from your lower self,” he said.

In response to an overwhelming amount of public inquiries about why Jaxn’s wife didn’t leave him upon hearing the news, Da’Nai shared publicly that she had in fact briefly fled their union. “There is no justification for bringing another woman into our relationship on any level,” Jackson stated. “It is unacceptable and this is not something I will tolerate or we will tolerate moving forward. I have been flooded with messages asking why haven’t I left but the answer for that is when I found out I did leave. I did not hesitate or waste my time. I stood firm on not coming back.”

“I did not come back until I saw a shift in his personality or how he presented himself during conversations. This is something we never had in 12 years of knowing each other,” she continued.

Da’Nai confirmed that the couple are currently together as a result of Jaxn’s effort to fortify their bond to the level of her expectations.”He continues to seek guidance and that is what I need to stay in the marriage,” she added.

She also rejected the idea that she should be embarrassed by the scandal. “Today, I am at peace and proudly stand by his side. I have no hesitation, no hurt, or shame about that and it’s only because of the grace of God and the mercy of God and we have already turned a new chapter in this story,” she said before sending De Medeiros and any one her husband may have dated.

“I forgive him, and I forgive the others as well.”